Episode 198 -- March 7, 2022

Meditation Monday: Start with Yourself

Welcome to Meditation Monday. We're pausing each Monday for a few minutes of reflection and inspiration from the authors of the Hazelden Meditation series of books.

Meditations are daily reflections, prayers, slogans and phrases intended to offer inspiration and comfort, and—above all—hope to those of us in recovery.

The selections for this early March Meditation Monday come from two of Hazelden's popular recovery resources:Walk in Dry Places and Days of Healing, Days of Joy. Together, these meditations invite us to honestly check in with our feelings and courageously open up to relationships of support.

Walk In Dry Places

WHAT DO I PROJECT?

Were we ever told that our problems with other people really started within ourselves? If we have trouble getting along with another person, for example, is it because we are projecting mixed signals of fear and suspicion toward that person? We tend to reap what we sow— we get back the attitudes we project.

At the same time, however, we can't take total responsibility for the way others treat us or behave toward us. We cannot reform or control impossible people. When dealing with impossible people, we have control over our own feelings and responses. This helps us avoid potential trouble and enables us to deal with difficult situations.

But the principle of sowing what we reap—that is, getting back what we project—can really be proved by the person whose resentments and bitterness have driven away most of their friends. A simple change of attitude on our part can bring startling change for the better in the responses of others. With practice, the principle also applies to the broad area of human relations in many ways. For purposes of inventory, therefore, we should always look first at ourselves and our own thoughts and feelings when we find ourselves in a bad situation with others.

I will take care today to see that my thoughts and feelings toward others reflect what I want in my own life. I cannot expect to harbor secret resentments without getting some of my own back.

Days of Healing, Days of Joy

You're only as sick as your secrets. - Twelve Step Saying

To think is to discover what's in the head. To share is to discover what's in the heart. In truth, we often don't know exactly what we think and feel until we share it with another. It is through the mysterious, subtle, powerful act of sharing that we can muster the courage to shed our fears. It is by asking for and gaining the support of others that we can dare to stand up in the sunshine with the rest of God's creatures.

Our friends in the program can't know what we don't tell them. They aren't mind readers. And they aren't deserving of our resentment and anger, which they often get, for not responding to a problem we didn't share with them. "Why don't they see?" we may whine to ourselves. "I have helped many of these people in their times of need. Now they're letting me bleed to death. Do I have to die before someone notices?

No. Probably all we have to do is tell them. If we let them know what's happening, we'll be amazed to find they were there for us all the time.

Today, I will challenge all of my reasons for not sharing. I will give sharing— and myself—a chance.

About the Author:
Walk in Dry Places was written by Mel B.
Days of Healing, Days of Joy was written by Earnie Larsen and Carol Hegarty.

Walk in Dry Places © 1996 by Hazelden Foundation
Days of Healing, Days of Joy © 1987, 1992 by Hazelden Foundation
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